In this Article:
- How can we heal relationships after a polarizing election?
- What are the eight elements of wisdom that aid in relationship healing?
- Why is prioritizing relationships over politics crucial for personal and societal well-being?
- How does embracing curiosity and tolerance help overcome political divides?
- What role does spirituality play in fostering hope and unity post-election?
How To Heal Relationship Rifts in Light of the Recent Elections
By Laura Gabayan, MD, MS
A lot has gone on in the US in a short period of time. Going into this election, we were a polarized country with great anxiety and fear. Now we have a definitive winner, but things haven’t changed. We’re still the same people with the same opinions and concerns.
The questions that remain include: how do we put the election in the past? How do we move forward despite our differing opinions? How do we maintain relationships despite the election results?
The Wisdom Research Project
I recently completed a study, The Wisdom Research Project, involving interviews with 60 wise adults. In compiling the results, I was able to scientifically define eight distinct elements of “wisdom” —
* Resilience,
* Kindness,
* Positivity,
* Spirituality,
* Humility,
* Tolerance,
* Creativity, and
* Curiosity.
What was most interesting about this study was that the interviewees had encountered extraordinary obstacles and yet lacked bitterness and anger and were able to remain at peace.
We need that same calm now that the election is over. We have to remind ourselves and to remember that maintaining and mending relationships in light of the election will take time.
Embracing the Elements of Wisdom
Here are some ways in which embracing the elements of wisdom will aid in moving forward amidst any volatile relationships:
1. Prioritize the relationship
A close relationship is more important than politics. Politics elicit all sorts of judgments and assumptions. For one person it may be a simple decision that they don’t think twice about. For another it may involve much contemplation.
Now that the election is behind us, put aside judgments and assumptions and focus on love and respect. This isn’t always easy to do when there are som many feelings involved. It requires an active decision to put the people with whom you have a relationship above political preferences. When all is said and done, it’s the relationships in your life that will bring you the greatest meaning.
Four of the eight elements of wisdom that I found in my research focus on building relationships: kindness, humility, tolerance, and curiosity.
* Be kind to others. We all seek and appreciate kindness.
* Be tolerant of other opinions. We are more similar than we are different.
* Be humble when discussing matters with others. You have no idea what the other persons has experienced. No human is superior to another.
* Ultimately, the element of curiosity is the foundation upon which all other elements of wisdom rest. Approaching others from a place of curiosity will remind you of the importance of being open-minded and will allow. You to be kind, humble, and tolerant.
2. Remind yourself of commonalities
Putting relationships first requires that you remind yourself of what we all have in common despite our differences. Think of what you like in another person. Just as you would while keeping a gratitude journal in which you reflect on the aspects of life you appreciate, think of the attributes that you appreciate in the people in your life.
You were drawn to each person for a particular reason. Bring to mind that reason with regard to each person.
Because we all have our natural biases, it’s easy to think of our differences. But we must overrule our biases and remind ourselves to focus on what makes our relationships worthwhile.
3. Have faith
Spirituality was among the eight elements of wisdom. It involves the belief that a higher power exists. Having faith brings with it a positive outlook and confidence that things will unfold just as they should. Living in faith enables us to counteract fear. It’s about being hopeful and optimistic even without knowing what lies ahead.
We’re all humans limited in our knowledge. Spirituality helps us to be open-minded and to not avoid or dismiss that which we don’t see or understand — in others and in society overall.
Healing our Wounds and Moving Forward
The election was the culmination of many points of contention. Now that it’s decided, it’s time to heal the wounds.
Healing starts with recognizing what’s more important in our lives — our relationships. Focus on putting relationships front and center and strengthening them despite our lingering differences.
Copyright 2024. All Rights Reserved.
Book by this Author:
BOOK: Common Wisdom
Common Wisdom: 8 Scientific Elements of a Meaningful Life
by Dr. Laura Gabayan.
Common Wisdom unveils the discoveries of The Wisdom Research Project, a fascinating journey led by Dr. Gabayan to explore the timeless question: What is Wisdom? Through engaging interviews with 60 wise individuals across North America, Dr. Gabayan uncovers 8 essential elements they share.
While rooted in scientific research, this book is beautifully written in a way that makes the profound insights accessible and relatable to everyone. It's not just a study—it's a secret formula for achieving happiness and success.
For more info and/or to order this book, click here. Available as an Audiobook, a Kindle edition, paperback and hardcover.
About the Author
Dr. Laura Gabayan is a world-renowned physician and expert in research. Through her Wisdom Research Project, she interviewed 60 wise adults across North America and defined the 8 fundamental elements of wisdom. She describes her findings in her new book, Common Wisdom: 8 Scientific Elements of a Meaningful Life (Redwood Publishing, March 17, 2024). For more information, visit TheWisdomResearchProject.com.
Article Recap:
The article discusses the critical need to heal and maintain relationships after a polarized election, emphasizing the importance of prioritizing personal connections over political affiliations. It introduces the eight elements of wisdom—resilience, kindness, positivity, spirituality, humility, tolerance, creativity, and curiosity—as tools to help individuals navigate and mend volatile relationships. The piece provides actionable advice on fostering unity and understanding through a compassionate and open-minded approach to interactions, ultimately aiming for a cohesive and peaceful community.
